Snippets, part II
Peanut: So that must mean Loaf’s eyes are ugly and ordinary.
(Mark looks at the new underwear I bought for the girls).
Mark: You bought them Granny underwear.
Me: Would you rather I got them a pack of lacy thongs?
(Driving by a farm, we spy a horse standing by a fence, so we stop to look at it).
Peanut: Is it a boy or a girl?
Me: I’m not sure.
Loaf: It’s a boy.
Peanut: How do you know?
Loaf: Because it has a pair in the back.
Me: Wait. What? It has a . . . WHAT?!?
Loaf: A pear. Like the fruit. There in the back. A BIG one!
Me: :::bangs head on steering wheel:::
(Later in the same car ride, one of the girls passes very stinky gas).
Me: Did one of you just have gas?
Me: Are you sure? Because it smells like gas in here.
Loaf: It was Daddy!
Me: He’s not even in the car. We're miles from home. If that was him, we’re in serious trouble.
Loaf: It was him and HE is in serious trouble.
Me: It was you, wasn’t it?
Loaf: ::shakes head vigorously with huge of-course-it-was-me smile on face::
To read previous Snippets click here.