Scenes from my life

Scene 1: My home on an ordinary morning, just after breakfast. The children are playing in the living room while I clean up the breakfast mess. Suddenly, the peace is broken by Peanut's hysterical cries. She comes into the kitchen red-faced, hyperventilating and with tears streaming down her face.
ME: What happened?
PEANUT: L . . . Lo . . . Loaf. Loaf bit me! On the back!
ME: Attempt to soothe her, rub her back, etc.
ME: Turning my attention to Loaf, I begin walking toward the living room to put Loaf into Time Out. I walk into the dining room to see Loaf already sitting in the Time Out chair.
LOAF: Time out, Momma! Time out.
ME: Quickly turn back into kitchen to ensure Loaf does not see me giggling.


Scene 2: The car, parked in the Trader Joe's parking lot. We've just finished our shopping and are climbing back into the car. Loaf begins tossing her books, one by one, out of the car and onto the blacktop.
ME: Hey! Stop throwing your books out.
LOAF: Tosses out another book.
ME: LOAF! If you keep doing that I'm going to take all of your books out of the car. Do you really want to sit back here all the time with nothing to do?
LOAF: very enthusiastically YES!

Oh, and on a completely unrelated matter, how sad is it that compared to Britney, K-Fed looks like a really great parent? Ugh.