Do as I say . . .

The scene: A mid-morning snack at our house yesterday.

Peanut requested dry cereal and I knew once Loaf saw what her sister had, she’d want some too. I poured some O’s into the only two clean bowls in the house: a pink one and a green one.

I was in a rush to get to the gym and absentmindedly put the green bowl in front of Peanut and the pink in front of Loaf. In case we have not covered this, Peanut loves all things pink. And I mean, she REALLY loves pink. It is, to quote Julia Roberts’s character in Steel Magnolias, her “signature color.”

Pissed at the indignity of having to eat from a non-pink bowl, Peanut shoved it onto the floor, spilling O’s all over the table and floor.

I immediately launched into lecture mode, sternly telling Peanut that we do not throw food on the floor in this house, and the problem could have been easily fixed by simply switching bowls with Loaf, all the while sweeping as much cereal as I could salvage from the table back into the green bowl.

I then plopped the green bowl in front of Loaf, who so far is perfectly happy to eat out of any dish or bowl regardless of its color, and picked up the pink bowl.

Still peeved by her actions, I pounded home my point one last time.

“So you understand Peanut? WE DO NOT. THROW FOOD. ON. THE. FLOOR,” I emphasized as I slid the bowl abruptly to her side of the table . . . and watched helplessly as it careened right off the edge of the table and landed upside down on the floor beside her chair.

Doof.