Monday, January 21, 2008

Play along: What do you think he did?!?

Today in Loehmann’s, I happened to look up and right in front of me is a young woman with an obviously bored-out-of-his-ever-fucking-mind man standing off to one side. Draped over his arm is a massive quantity of women’s clothing.

She is furiously rifling through the sales rack in front of her, occasionally plucking something out and hanging it over her own arm. Suddenly, she stops, turns to him and snaps, “Here! This is getting heavy again. You hold it,” as she transfers her pile of clothing to his.

He actually winces in a display of physical pain when this happens. I’m not sure if that’s due to her gruff manner, the gargantuan weight of the clothing, or impending credit card bill he knows he is about to receive from this little expedition.

Clearly, he was not there by choice, because really, what man who is not under serious womanly peril would chose to spend his afternoon like that? So my theories as to why he was playing the role of her shopping caddy are:

A. He spent all day yesterday screaming at the NFL playoffs and ignored her,
B. He was out with friends at a bar screaming at the NFL playoff games all night and did not arrive home until the wee hours of the morning, or
C. He was found looking at porn on his computer.

Any guesses? Come on – we can all play along.

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7 Comments:

Blogger ryssee said...

I'm gonna guess A. But really if she were paying attention to the calendar, she'd know A or B would likely happen.
If I'm gonna play along, I'm gonna say that she caught him wearing her clothes while watching the game, 'cause the Pats game ended right after the mall closed. HAHAHA!

6:51 PM  
Blogger Beth said...

I vote "A". That seems to be what most guys did Sunday, right? But, wow, she sounds like she's got him wrapped around that little finger, doesn't it?

beth

7:55 PM  
Blogger Rocas said...

I think it was D: He has actually been henpecked for all their wedded days, but he plays along with it because he knows that soon, very soon, his grand plan will come to fruition and the next person that will ever see her again will be an archeologist.


Or it could be C

8:23 PM  
Blogger HG said...

Ha! This is a fun game. I'm guessing that he made a comment about how hot one of her friends was.

7:39 AM  
Blogger Maureen said...

I think B! But really, any of them could apply :)

hg has a pretty good option too!

11:01 AM  
Blogger imaginary binky said...

I vote: he accidentally chipped her acrylic nails that had decorations of flags on them. Or, he sat on her poodle. Or, he called her mother a whore.

No?

3:09 AM  
Blogger Unruly Jets Fan said...

That was hiliarious Gav!!!

12:45 PM  

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