Monday, October 06, 2008

Listening to my inner voice

Psssst. Hey? You. There on the computer. Do you know how many days have passed since you posted something on your blog?

Me: Um, I dunno. Three?

WRONG! Try five. Five days. And your last post was a Wordless Wednesday, which, while cute, does not exactly show off your wit or witticism as a writer.

Me: Sorry, I’ve been busy.

Busy is no excuse. None! You’ve got a small, but loyal group of readers now. And if you want to build on that, you’ve got to keep posting fresh material. Often. Do you know how many people have undoubtedly visited your blog since last Wednesday only to be disappointed at your utter lack of devotion, creativity and skill? Who knows how many. We’ll never know, because they’ll probably never come back.

Me: Yikes, don’t be so harsh. I told you, I’ve been busy.

Bloggers all over the country – the world – are busy, kid. And they still manage to post an interesting anecdote or observation every couple of days. They dig deep, and they find something to write about. You? Are not keeping up. Let’s think. There must be something interesting going on with you?

Me: Well, um, let's see . . .

OH COME ON! This is pathetic. Kids, think kids. They’re always doing something blog-worthy.

Me: Actually, lately, there hasn’t been much material there.

Nothing? No fits? No tantrums? Nothing that’s driving you crazy?

Me: Not really. Nothing new, at least. In fact, they’ve been remarkably well behaved lately.

Well, there has to be something. Think, kid, think. Have they hidden anything in a funny place recently?

Me: Not that I can recall.

Don’t you have some snarky political rant to share with the world?

Me: Well, truthfully, I’m feeling like that’s pretty much being covered elsewhere right now.

You must have had an amusing conversation with someone in your house lately?

Me: Ummm. . . .

Dude! Come on! You’re not even trying.

Me: I am, really, I am. It’s just, I’ve been busy and . . .

We’ve already been over that. There has to be something. Some sappy observation about how the girls are growing up from under you? You’re always good for a few of those.

Me: Honestly, I’ve got nothing.

What am I going to do with you? You’re useless. Your blogging cache is as vacant as Sarah Palin’s brain.

Me: Hey! You just made a funny!

So I did.

Me: Should we post it and call it a night?

Works for me. But you better make a real effort this week to post more often.

Me: I promise! Thanks, Mean Subconscious Voice.

No problem. All in a days work, kid.

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Blogger Colleen said...


I've been feeling the same way.

9:21 PM  
Anonymous xup said...

Hey – a post about not posting. Cute!

4:41 PM  
Blogger Jennifer H said...

Very clever...

I was looking at my posts and realized that from September 19 until now, I've only posted 5 times.
Not exactly burning up the bandwidth over at my place, either.

7:53 PM  
Anonymous Kimmylyn said...

Oh I loved this..and sooo mad I did not think of it first!! hahahah

9:44 PM  

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